The Paper Bag

trash

 

Dear Brown Paper Bag,

You were there when I was broke. You looked like something out of a postage store with your nondescript packaging. It was before the idea of dainty handles made from braided paper. Fitting in was out of style.

There’s a certain dignity to being plain when you know you’re a necessity. Frills are for those without substance. Your no nonsense attitude was perfect for packed lunches on the job. I put the beer at the bottom.

So why did you change? Did you feel the need to compete with shoulder bags? Were you trying to attract someone else? Someone who had places to go? Someone who wanted to be seen?

 

I miss giving you notes.

Don’t worry about a thing – he probably didn’t even notice they caught fire. Remember to act stupid and I’ll see you at home.

xoxo

Your favorite

 

I miss giving you everything I could find. Mints stolen from the Chinese food store down the street. Sandwiches with three different kinds of meat. You were open to everything.

I saw you, or the latest version of you, at the grocery store last week and couldn’t bring myself to walk over. Sitting in the same aisle as organic wrapping paper and blank cards featuring vaguely artistic photographs, you weren’t in the right place.

$3.99 per bag.

Let me know when you’re back to being trashy.

Sincerely,

Your ex wife

18 responses to “The Paper Bag”

  1. Love this. Let me know when you’re back to being trashy..! Some paper bags really have delusions of grandeur.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Such a delightfully fun read. You expressed all there is to say about paper bags👍😊

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  3. The File Pile Avatar
    The File Pile

    When people say to appreciate the little things, this is what they mean. Love the clever observations mixed with the personification, how you can make something like a paper bag seem like it has demons and flaws is beyond impressive. Thanks for sharing!

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  4. Aw, you’ve restored my long-lost affection for paper bags!

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  5. What’s a paper bag? I thought they all went plastic years ago. I didn’t know they were making a designer come back. I sort of like plastic. They make good trash can liners. Don’t tell my environmentally conscious friends, though.

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  6. I read somewhere the divorce rate for paper bags is up 18% over the past two decades. It’s worrisome.

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  7. A Woman of a Certain Age Avatar
    A Woman of a Certain Age

    This is just wonderful💛

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  8. Love this….I could feel the way the paper bag used to feel…used and crumbled, and undone over and over,…Namaste’

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  9. That is cute – and so true. I guess the paper bag changed when a cup of plain old coffee became $5 at Starbucks

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  10. You are so right! Unfortunately, in the Form VS. Function competition, today, form seems to win every time.

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  11. Simply a marvel . Anand Bose from Kerala

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  12. Fantastic! Love the wit.

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  13. Your writing is brilliant!

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  14. Loved reading this.

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  15. You’re very clever with words and ideas- keep up the writing!

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